When Barbie was young, everyone knows she only dated Ken. That was particularly weird being that Ken was her brother, but when you don't have a lot of options what can you do? So she did it, but there were never as many Kens, and she pretty much had to accept that her Ken was going to be running around with other Barbies, WHICH she didn't mind too much back in the beginning because there was only one style of Barbie, and this lack of diversity made them one big happy family that was, like, broken down into a few million pieces, but acting, living and looking like one. So it was ok.
But now it's different. Now there are so many styles of Barbie out there that it's much harder, emotionally, for them to share each other with those limited number of Ken dolls and still feel good about themselves. I mean, to see Ken with a blonder, bigger and longer legged Barbie, for instance, would be too much for most Barbies.
So eventually they, too, strayed, and not just to different styles of Ken either, but outside the species even, yes, to NSync dolls and Star Wars dolls, and baseball figurines, and whatever else was in reach (the slut). There was even a brief scandal over Barbie and Peter Pan, but it wasn't clear what the issue was, was it that she was robbing the cradle, or was it something else entirely, something transvestite or lesbian (we never really knew about Peter) or both, or all three? Anyway, she was never brought up on charges of any kind (a little payoff here or there always paves the way of Barbies reputation), but regardless of all that, the interbreeding was still a rampant epidemic.
And Barbie needed to improve her image. So she began looking for someone more wholesome, someone maybe a little homely, maybe even a little plump.
And she found him.
When she first met Ronald McDonald at a fundraiser for the Ronald McDonald house she didn't think that he was the one she was looking for but he sure was a charmer, as anyone can tell you if they've ever been to a circus before (or was that him?). And it didn't hurt that he had an unlimited supply of McDonald salads either, or that he could juggle, or that he was soft. She soon fell in love with everything from his fixed and permanent smile (she had one too!) to his corny stupid laugh. But the clincher of the deal was his really big FEET. Barbie has a foot fetish (She secretly wishes she could have feet that big, so that she can, like, stand up).
Word got around, and soon she wasn't the only Barbie doll that was interested in Ronald. McDonald. They followed in droves. Something about that red hair and white face, and… and… that clown outfit, that just attracts beautiful big breasted dolls of all professions.
Anyway, that's how Barbie got to be in happy meals.